Recently a friend of mine suggested that I should just write down my random thoughts. I have them a lot, we all do. Since writing something coherent, let alone interesting and cohesive, is kinda hard, I figured, what the hay, I’ll share them with you.
I sure wish my cat would shut the hell up.
If I were Elon Musk I’d invent a laser gun that attaches to the roof of my car with a 360 degree rotation. That way the next time some asshole driving a Ford Phallus rides my buttbumper at 80 mph I could turn his F250 into an F125.
Preamble of the Constitution, as voice to text while driving:
Were the people of United States an order form a more perfect union and quality provide for the common defense you were doing and if everything competition for United States of America. Amen.
They should make coffee like chewing tobacco. Just a pinch ‘tween your cheek n gum… also with flavored non-dairy whiteners. Soooo easy in the morning.
If they could also, while they were at it, make cat litter out of pine seeds then you could just bury it in your back yard. Instant forest.
The big difference between us and a colony of ants is that ants don’t worry about their abs or hair.
Ever noticed that when people feel bad they tend to believe the rest of their lives will feel that way? How come they don’t do that with joy?
Cats are actually a lot like dogs but cats play at 33 1/3 speed and dogs at 78 speed.
A life well lived is the best revenge… or a flaming crossbow arrow right between the eyes. Either way.
Humans sure do like to tribe up.
Speaking of humans, favorite line about them from a movie (Star man):
Star man: Shall I tell you what I find beautiful about you?
Star man: You are at your very best when things are worst.
I find the best way to end an unwanted or awkward conversation is to start drooling.
Additionally, I find the spelling of the word awkward awkward. Ironic.
If just about everything is a biofuel why hasn’t someone looked into farts as a fuel source. Sometimes I think I could power my entire apartment complex (500 units) singlehandedly for a week. I mean, we plug our phones in about 6 times a day… it’d be just like that.
If God were really going to take issue with a food source I think it should be oysters instead of pork.
A haiku about painting:
fighting the tiredness
painting through the cold morning
brush in my coffee
If they made guys speedos printed to look like a neked female nether-region, that would be a fun day at the beach. I would call them Sheedo’s.
The problem with perception is that it’s usually based on the viewpoint of where you are standing. You only have that one perspective. That’s why I may be standing here but I’m thinking from over there.
Authenticity is like comedy. You have to be brave enough to put it out there in front of an audience and be willing to fail. And there will be failure but that’s where refinement comes in. Try, fail, try, fail, refine, try again, succeed. Life without refinement is just crazy.
True authenticity rises to the top, maybe not right away, but in the long run it always does.
A story: A man in an AA meeting has his turn to speak, “I can’t take it anymore, I just sit on the couch and think about drinking all the time.” Another man listens intently and says, “Maybe you should sit somewhere else.”
And a favorite quote: Don’t believe everything you think.
No idea comes from nothing
Fully formed ideas rarely just show up without provocation. They arrive through a series of steps, born from the seedlings that float around in the conscious and subconscious ether, much like an ocean swell that starts as an unorganized mass of wavelets and builds slowly over time and distance; morphing, combining, recombining, and growing. The majority of monumental ideas throughout history originated as simple notions that were inspired by or built on top of other existing notions.
Life changing concepts like natural selection, the general theory of relativity, the discovery of the DNA double helix, the color wheel, fruit roll-ups, and the structure of an atom evolved through the collective framework of many minds, very few are actually attributable to just one individual. Ideas are compound notions.
To learn creativity is to acquire the tool kit to build your own inspiration, rather than waiting a long dry summer for the muse to show up. Start with the frame of mind of being Open. Open-minded is just a portion of the state of Open, just one coat hanger in the closet. This way of being is transcendental without being spiritual, though it can feel that way. It not only allows for new notions to be considered, it enables new combinations of ideas and, unlike meditation, your mind can be completely full rather than empty.
Learning it is easy, applying it is hard. (Apropos to most everything)
And still my cat will not shut the hell up.